still ok

 a bit sad on Saturday because I didn't water my plant for like 1.5 weeks and it was so dry, two leaves fell off. I felt like a sinner for murdering my plant (it is not dead yet, just dying) (still green) (dry and crispy and smells exactly like the leaf in tempura) (maybe most leaves smell similar when dried, idk lol)

to combat the very sad mood, I watched chiikawa episodes I have saved up for the past two months.

Sunday was better, I secretly cooked my own breakfast while my parents went 拜山 (I felt quite guilty as I overslept and I already didn't attend a relative's funeral previously). Anyways yeeeeeee it's my first time cooking something at home. (We did cook with IH stoves during secondary school home economics class but I haven't tried cooking at home + it's the gas, real fire type of stove + I cook by myself)

It's just a fried egg and also heated a toast with butter. Niiiiceeeeee

Simple but I am proud of it :))

These few days I have been rescuing my plant. Now some leaves are overwatered yet some leaves are still dry (a bit wetter than before). Weird. I'll keep observing it. When it gets better I will get some soil and maybe a slightly bigger pot. Because apparently the soil gets used up?? and I can literally see the roots sticking out. I googled and it says it is being limited by the small pot. And it couldn't hold water effectively if it has little soil.

I still studied, but only like 2 lectures per day. Compared to day one when I revised 5-6 lectures. Also to my pleasant surprise, the stuff I revised are retained in my brain after sleeping. Just like secondary school.

I began to question if it was really my own problem and issue with my perception. Cuz my mum and dad seem normal. (Well they are trying so many methods to "encourage" me to keep my door open. E.g. they closed my window saying there would be bugs coming in, so I need to open my door to allow the fresh cool air from their room's air-con to ventilate my room)

I was so so so confused these few days.

Turns out I am still correct LMAO

Yesterday midnight I was drawing. I was planning to draw for a while and then I'll go to sleep. I accidentally drew until 4am (I looked at the clock once and it was 1am, so I continued, and I didn't expect it to be 4am lmao). I didn't close my door for the ^ air-con reason. I heard a footstep. I expected my mum to arrive in 2 seconds. I mentally prepared myself.

But she arrived in 1 second! So 1 second earlier than I expected, and she was peeking inside the door instead of by the door, aka she was closer than I expected. And she suddenly yelled at me for not sleeping. I was shocked so I also slightly 哇！

YEah! So I was not tripping. The problems are still here.

Ngl I was kinda happy albeit shocked, because her sudden appearance makes me more certain that I am not remembering things incorrectly / overreacting before, and it was actually that bad.

(wow Mom's calling, it's just 8pm haha) (maybe because I went home early yesterday at like 7pm, and they were standing in the living room doing all sorts of weird "歡迎歡迎，熱烈歡迎" welcome home stuff, they say it is like welcoming soldiers back home,,, "紅衛兵" tf) Bro this is so weird I-

(oh apparently they cleaned the aircon in my room, so I get a functional aircon now!) (?? that means I can close my door?)

Anyways

immmmm savingggggg moneyyyyy

I decided to eat more dinner if I can at home, this way I can save money. And I can eat less for lunch at school/ other places. (Also being on time for shuttle bus saves like $5-10 per day. Speaking of on time, I was only late for psyc for 10 minutes! And med lectures for around 30 min. Compared to one hour before. I am trying. Although it looks like I'm not...)

Recently there was a deliveroo offer of 50% off Mos Burger pick-up. So for the last two weeks they have been buying Mos Burger. I grew tired of it. And especially when I got the coupons from McDonald's in which I just need to pay $20 for a set meal (they don't know). So many hamburgers I wanna cry lol (jk i wont cry), reminded me of the time back in Year 1, when Ivan kept urging our group to eat Subway every single day and we're like nah,, but we were too naive/ kind to reject him. Lmao. Anyways now he mentions less Subway so it is better. (I remembered back in Y1 Sept everyone instantly knows him because he used to be super active in our year whatsapp group with that very unique nickname, + being a Subway fan, eating Subway very frequently and posting paragraphs about Subway (and other deep stuff that I don't understand) lmao

noooooooooooooooooooooooo I don't want any more bread

I like bread but this is too much

I notified him about a singer he likes is coming to hku for an event or something, and told him to sign up lol, I hope he doesn't dislike me that much

I think I was a bit sensitive mainly because of the frowning emoji lol

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa anyways yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Idk why I am not hyper. But I don't think I suddenly recovered??

Also today there was a time clash between a practical and the psyc midterm paper review session. There were two timeslots available for the practical. I planned to go for the alternate time slot, but realised I knew no one there + all the people I dislike are at that timeslot/ in that half of the cohort, which means I have no tables to attach to (tables are according to groups and technically I am not in that half so there's no table for my group). Plus I was kind of scared to go alone because the prof would be there.

So I ditched the paper review and went for the practical in the original timeslot. The syllabus for the final exam doesn't cover the midterm ones anyways. Just sucks because I want to know what I got wrong for one of the essays, I only got like 50% for that essay meanwhile all other parts were pretty good)

So in the practical I met a new friend :D It was my groupmate's friend who was attaching at our table.

Pretty easygoing (I checked her insta she was super religious ok lolll)

anyways new friend!

I think I need to know more people in our year. Bro I have so few friends (so I was slightly upset ivan tell me to find my friends to eat because i think he knows I don't have that many friends as compared to him loljaskfldsfhsjk I think I am a bit 小氣 aaaaaaaaa it's just a tiny thing bro I am a rather shitty person hahahah) (but it's my fault for eating too frequently with him)

i believe we are still very good friends (at least I think so), but this is how I generally push away good friends once they accumulate enough "tiny stuff" like this and I get annoyed, and then after a while I forgot about these and I will go closer to these friends again. So maybe thats why some may think I am 忽冷忽熱. (because they dont know i am mad lol, I just stayed away). Very bad. Need to change